Nightlife Hangover Anecdotes

Published on December 8th, 2012 | by Alfonso "MiLLioN" Johnson


Hangover Anecdotes: When It Comes To Pizza I’m An A**Hole

Just a disclaimer – while writing this, I am extremely hungover…so I plan on making this story short and sweet.

If you live in the Tampa Bay area and enjoy the occasional nightlife experience, chances are that you’ve been to First Friday down in St. Pete. First Friday is great and is probably the one night of each month where you’ll most likely get into the most debaucherous acts and/or arguments with random people…what could be more fun than that??

Nothing. Exactly.

So this morning, I woke up with not only a pounding headache from the massive amounts of alcohol that were ingested last night during First Friday, but also with the lingering feeling that my friends and I were extreme assholes to people in a pizza shop. Honestly, right now the details are pretty blurry, but from what I can remember – after we left Vintage Ultra Lounge, we got in line outside of some pizza shop on Central Ave. Apparently a couple of trashy looking broads and their Peter Parker look-a-like (Tobey Maguire, not Andrew Garfield) felt that we had cut them in line and chances are…we did. Not on purpose of course, because it’s not like it was the most organized line we’ve ever seen. I’ve definitely seen 2nd graders line up much better than these people.

So for all intents and purpose, let’s just say my friends and I happened to cut them in line unknowingly. Any civilized person who felt disrespected by our actions would have said, “Excuse me guys, but you’ve just cut us. The back of the line is over there.” And at that moment we would’ve been like “Oh shit, our bad” – and that would’ve been that. Problem solved. But that’s not how it went down.

For some reason drunken females swear that their balls are bigger than anyone else’s in the room, and by yelling, they believe that positive results will occur. So these chics, let’s call them “Lindsay Lohan” and “Amanda Bynes” for sake of embarrassment, proceeded to curse and swear while throwing their hands up in the air, ordering us to get out of the line. Now if there’s one thing we don’t do, it’s taking orders from random people – especially not drunken slores who at one point even said that they wanted to fight us. Bitches be crazy.

The best part of this entire situation, is that while all of this hoot and hollering was going on between us and them, we were ordering multiple slices of pizza, drinks and even carrying on conversations with the guys behind the counter. I have no doubt that those who were witnessing this amazing spectacle, one that you would only see during First Friday, received such enjoyment that words couldn’t even describe. I’m pretty sure one of the chics even said they were going to call the cops on us for cutting them in line. If a cop was called and he found out the details of the situation – he probably would’ve night-sticked the broad for wasting his time. At least until she bought him a sicilian slice.

Needless to say, we never got out of the line, we still received our food before them, and they probably woke up with laryngitis.

So yea, my friends and I are assholes…{shrug}…but only when it’s called for.

MiLLioN out…

If you were in our shoes what would you have done?? Do you and your friends also have a crazy drunken experience while at First Friday – or at any club or bar?? Let us know in the comments below.

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About the Author

Brooklyn native; lover of Chipotle; über music enthusiast, and most definitely joining any escapade as long as tequila's involved. You only live once – unless you eat green 'shrooms; after that, the possibilities are endless.

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